Happy Gotcha Day, Figlet!

One year ago today we loaded up Dexter and Lacey, driving about a half hour away to meet a small black-and-white spotty dog.

I had been following her page on Petfinder for a couple of weeks, ogling her pictures and obsessively re-reading her description. She was one of those dogs that, for some reason you can't quite articulate, stick with you. You can't get them out of your mind. You picture them in your home, sharing your life with you. You ponder names and what colour collar they will wear.

My husband wasn't as tempted as I was and he wanted to look at dogs closer to home (she was being fostered over an hour and a half away). I understood his reasoning, but the little dog with the funny name hovered in my mind. I kept bringing her up; I couldn't help myself. Finally he said, "Alright. E-mail the rescue and see if she's still available." I did. I didn't think such a sweetheart of a dog would still be without a home, but she was.

E-mails were exchanged and a meetup was scheduled. The day after my husband's birthday we loaded up the furry ones and rushed off, all excitement and nerves, to meet a little dog called Fig.

I was smitten the moment I saw her in person. I wanted to wrap her up in a great big hug and never let go. But I managed not to, because that's not a polite way to greet an unknown dog.

Clearly, the meeting went well. Fig and Dex got along just dandy. Fig even behaved around Lacey the cat, which had been my biggest concern. (In fact, Fig showed no interest in Lacey at all). And so Figgy came home with us that very afternoon.

I knew it was right when Fig jumped into the back of our SUV, settled down in her seat and fell asleep straight away.

Determination vs doofiness

Today involved a lot of moving furniture to clean thoroughly, interrupted by bouts of this:

I wish I could look upon the world with the eyes of a dog

Today can be summed up like so:

Observing dogs

Four days ago I was playing with our visitor, Kiana, and a de-squeaked Good Cuz toy (the orange one that has seen Dexter through puppy months and into adulthood, somewhere along the way losing its squeakability). Eventually she grew tired of me throwing it for her and laid down to chew on it. Dex got up, approached and tried to entice her to play (posturing, pawing, nose-bopping, nomming on her head; the usual stuff they do to each other when they want to play). It didn't work. Instead, she kind of became protective of the Good Cuz. (Or, at least that's how it appeared to me). She tensed before lifting her lip at him while clenching the toy. He took a step back but didn't leave. When he didn't leave she dropped the Good Cuz to bare her teeth. As the Good Cuz rolled away, Dex laid his muzzle across her muzzle. When he did this Kiana stopped baring her teeth. He stood there for a moment, his body relaxed and his muzzle rested on hers. Then he slowly walked away, picked up the Good Cuz and brought it back to her. He dropped it in between her paws, gave a goofy grin, and asked her to play again. She responded by initiating biteyface with him.

The Good Cuz was quickly forgotten.

Why socializing puppies (and dogs) is so important

Socialization is giving your puppy (or dog) lots of opportunities to explore and experience the world (and its inhabitants) at his or her own pace. It's discovering all the fascinating aspects that make up life in our society, from your vacuum cleaner vacuuming up dog hair to your next door neighbor that towers over 6'5" tall. Lots of positive experiences early--carefully guided by you, the patient, loving owner--in life translate into an adult dog that isn't spooked by things or people that are "different."

The biggest reason to socialize is two-fold:
- To raise a dog that isn't fearful and anxious, which is a sorry way to live and experience life, and
- To raise a dog that isn't a threat to your family, friends and neighbors, because aggressive behavior is often rooted in fear.

Looking back, many people realize their dog's aggressive behavior is tied to what the dog didn't learn as a puppy. Some folks either didn't know about socialization, didn't understand how to go about it, or started off with a puppy (or dog) that was already far behind in socialization (or a combination of these). Some people are content to manage their dog and their dog's life as best as possible. Others tackle the sometimes painfully slow task of playing catch-up with socialization.

I've been there, that heart-breaking moment where you realize you failed to do something or didn't quite do it right. It's not normal to have visitors over and have your 8-month-old puppy lunge and bark menacingly. It's not normal to have [so-called] behavior experts label your 10-month-old puppy a dangerous liability and suggest euthanasia. This is the sad reality of failing to properly socialize a puppy. A premature end due to behavior problems can be prevented. A puppy should never be a lost cause.

In 2007 I adopted Dexter, who was listed as a 7-month-old puppy, from the Hawai'ian Humane Society. The HHS couldn't tell me anything about his socialization and he was already well past the critical socialization window (which is between 3 and 12 weeks, a time frame that demonstrates how important a responsible breeder is as a responsible breeder will have begun socializing puppies before they go to their new homes). I mentally prepared myself for issues, particularly related to lack of proper socialization, and did a lot of reading and planning in advance.

The good news is that whatever early socialization Dexter did or did not receive he grew into a fantastic, social dog. I cannot take a lot of credit for that though I did immediately begin (or continue) socializing him when he came home. I went about it slowly at first, not knowing what he could or could not handle. And when I saw what he was capable of, we went out every day and met lots of new people and dogs. We went on as many outings as we could and I worked hard to keep experiences positive for him.

There were hiccups along the way. Like when my husband and I realized he was afraid of men in uniform. I found this interesting as the HHS told us his previous owners were a military family. (Hmm...) Or when I discovered he was skittish around black men. Then there was the night I discovered Dexter found motorcycles to be very creepy, untrustworthy things (that spawned from the eighth level of hell, Dexter believed). Each of these obstacles was an opportunity for me to teach Dex something new. But wouldn't it have been nice if I hadn't have needed to change his opinion of these perfectly normal people and things in life?

As I said previously, Dex did grow up to be a wonderful, social dog. Last week we were invited to a New Year's Eve party. Yes, you read that correctly: We, as in Dexter, Figlet, our visitor Kiana and myself. (How cool is that?) In the end, only Dexter and I went.* We had a blast! There were sixteen other people there, which included: One senior, ten adult males and females, five children ranging from ages 1 to teen. There were also two 3-month-old puppies.

Dear Dexter handled loud music, fireworks going off in the background, some goofy drunks, annoying puppy antics, and a new environment like a champ. He was not phased by the differences amongst the people: Age, height, size, colour, or differences in behavior. He even got hit by a guitar at one point when he and its player zagged at the same moment. (Don't worry; he was fine!)


Stylized image of Dexter and I sitting at the party with some people around us (and more out of frame), plus two resting puppies. Original photo by our lovely hostess.

I'm really proud of Dex. And I'm so very glad I can take him places like that and know he'll take it in stride.

*I decided to leave Kiana home after I discovered a potential fear of a specific group of people. The night before the party she met two of the party-goers and she did NOT handle it well at all. Figlet, on the other hand, was left at home both to keep Kiana company and because I have never seen Figlet in such a large group of people. (We've done groups of up to eight previously, myself included). I adopted her well into adulthood and while we've continued her socialization, which she relishes, we've yet to have such an opportunity (in ten months of living together). Perhaps I should have taken her, gone prepared, and resolved to take her home if it seemed too much for her. But it seemed so much wiser to leave her at home as company for Kiana.